It is a chilly Sunday morning where we live, and I am up before everyone else, drinking coffee and doing some chores before the day begins with all of the family activities that make up our busy weekends.
L is sound asleep in bed, still wearing the black negligee she wore to bed last night for our session. If I were to choose, her slumbering could come to an immediate end. I could go in the bedroom, lock the door behind me, and get in bed next to her. I could awaken her by presenting her with my cock, most likely still smelling of sex from our combined juices the night before, and have her start sucking on it even before she was fully awake. I could have her suck on it to complete hardness, my hand guiding the back of my head, my sounds showing my approval. Once completely hard and throbbing, I could withdraw from her mouth, spread her legs apart, and slide inside of her; not gently, not intimately, not nicely, but forcefully, filling her cunt with my presence, fucking her hard and urgently with regard for nothing but my own orgasm and desire to fill her with my cum much as I had done hours ago, and with last night's ejaculation still dry on her thighs after it leaked out of her. I could do that, and then withdraw, give her a tender kiss on the forehead and tell her what a good pet she was, and then go back to my morning tasks.
I could do those things. And anything else I wanted. At anytime.
But that doesn't always mean that I should do those things.
I believe the true definition of power is how you choose not to use it as opposed to how you use it. When L signed our D/s contract more than three years ago, she did so knowing that she could completely trust me with the control she was giving to me, and I believe I have done a good job of meeting those expectations. We have taken it to extreme levels at times, as readers of this blog know...rape scenes, threesomes, public play...but in all of these instances I have been mindful of her needs and the affect anything we did would have on her.
In my closet there is a box full of toys that have been used on L at various times over the years, some more than others, some hardly at all. The anal hook she gave me as a gift a couple of years ago has only been used once; for that matter, anal play is something we rarely do which is why last night after a thorough session of caning her, I reintroduced her to the rather large butt plug that hadn't made an appearance in quite some time. The intention was to use it to prepare her ass for my own cock, which made L very nervous and wasn't something she necessarily wanted to do, but...did I mention I can do anything that I want? I got her ass nice and prepared with the red butt plug, watching as I inserted it deep into her tight ass while my fingers worked magic on her dripping cunt and swollen clit, and when I was done playing with her and deciding my options on which hole I would use to satisfy myself, opted for the cunt. Because it is a delicious cunt, and each time I fuck it it feels like the first time.
So that is what I did.
But I could have fucked her up the ass.
One of the things I enjoy about this relationship is challenging myself, inserting control over my own desires as opposed to hers. I try to hold off on m own orgasm when fucking L for as long as I can. When we start a session I often times want to just leave the cane in the closet, or whatever other device I am using that night, and simply just fuck her.
There are many other things I want to do with L that we have not done yet; she is aware of my desires and fantasies. I like to draw those things out, present them when the moment is like, plan things carefully, and not rush through things like a bull in a China shop. With that comes the thrill of anticipation, and greater fulfillment for the two of us.
Now, if you'll excuse me, the day is about to begin here and I need to go back to the bedroom. I have a fucktoy in there and a certain part of me is in need of some attention from her.