Tuesday, August 28, 2012

New purchase

I work 14-hour days five days a week so pet and I don't get a chance to go socialize together as much as we would like, which is unfortunate, as we are both social creatures and have fun together. Pet has a group of friends she likes to go socialize with at the neighborhood bar from time to time while I at work, which she does, but only after permission from me and she is required to check in with me.

I have been telling her that I am going to buy something for her so that she is reminded of my presence and who in fact owns her pussy when she is not around me, so today I picked up the following..a pair of Crystal Kegel Eggs and delivered them to her office. She plans on going out tonight, and is required to insert them before going out and can only take them out once she gets back home.

I don't think she is a fan of them...hasn't tried them yet. I suppose there is concern of them possibly falling out but my pet has exceptional muscle control (it's quite nice) down there so I think they are safe. And like she said...she knows it could have been something a lot worse.

The Challenge

My pet has a highly competitive streak about her and is always up for a challenge. It's part of her strong and stubborn nature, and as her Dominant, it keeps things...interesting...for me as I tame her. As we have explored our D/s relationship together (a relationship we agree that we could not or ever have with anyone else, that it was something we could only find with each other as a result of the journey we have taken in the close to three years we have known each other), I have found various ways (thank you nipple clamps!) to keep her in her place, but also have found that often times it is not necessary because she truly knows her place with me...and wants/desires to be in that place with me.

Anyway...

My pet has a highly competitive streak about her and is always up for a challenge. So I have issued one to her. I'm quite good at Scrabble. Pet and I have played only once and there was no winner as the game was never completed (we have a difference of opinion on why that was). Pet is very smart in many ways, but I feel pretty strongly and confidently I can beat her in Scrabble.

So I issued her the following.

We play and if I win, nothing happens. Nothing changes.

We play and she wins, I will hand over reins to her...so to speak...for one day and let her briefly be my Dominant.

We play the game Thursday evening. Will let you know the outcome.


Monday, August 27, 2012

Dishonesty

I've read on several blogs and websites how no Dominant is perfect, how mistakes will be made along the way as that is how it goes in any relationship, and a D/s relationship is no different.

I made a big mistake this weekend that I am having a hard time with because I consider it one of those ones that, as a D, I just should have known better and it is an inexcusable one in my book. Last Friday I required, as a punishment, for L to complete a writing assignment where she had to write "I will always respond to my Master's memo of the day." 125 times. She hates writing assignments like this, thus making it a rather effective punishment. Her instructions were to have it ready for me by the time I got home later that night.

She completed the assignment and had it in the nightstand on my side of the bed and I forgot to check it when I got off of work late that night. In part, I trusted that she had completed it in the manner I had directed and didn't need to check it. Still, it was important that I should have checked it. I didn't do it the next nigh either.

Here is where I made the big mistake. On Friday night L asked me if I had checked it and, I suppose mainly because I was so embarrassed that I hadn't, I said yes, I had checked it. It was an outright lie. One of the worst things, in my mind, that a D could do in a D/s relationship, because of the level of trust that a sub needs to have  with her Dominant. The next day (Saturday) we were doing something in the bedroom and L looked inside the drawer where she found her assignment, still contained within the envelope. 

"You lied to me!" she said to me, and I wasn't quite sure how to respond...I apologized with my face about as red as it could get, then opened the envelope and checked it over. We didn't talk about it for the rest of the weekend, though it was always on the forefront of my mind as I wrestled with what I should do abut it.

Below is the email exchange from L and I this morning:

L: Still can't believe you lied to me.

Me: I know, and I am embarrassed as hell that I did and know how really, really wrong that was. Not even sure why I did it...was embarrassed that I hadn't checked yet. 

I am truly sorry about that. I really am. It was a big mistake to do that, and I live up to it.

Me: I have been stewing on that all weekend...meant to bring it up. Being dishonest like that is wrong in any relationship, but as your D, it is especially wrong. I promise you with all of my heart that it will never happen again, ok?

L: Yeah.  Such a silly thing to lie about and you did it so well.  Makes me wonder what else you have lied about or what in the future. I think that you get lying is never good..........especially with me.

I am absolutely torn up over this, and it is not the typical male reaction that I feel bad I got caught, I feel bad over what I did...that I did something so foolish that would cause the person who means more to me than anyone in the world to possibly not trust me, especially given that trust is the pinnacle of any relationship, but particular a D/s. Especially ours, because L suffered through a great deal of dishonesty in her marriage.

L and I always manage to work though things together...there have been quite a few things we have worked through in our relationship, going back to before we became D/s. I want to make this right again, to bring my pet back into being able to fully and completely trust me again. 

I'm sick to my stomach right now over this and would really like to get advice from other Doms on this.





Friday, August 17, 2012

Punishment

It's been awhile since I have added some new toys to our collection, so after I went to lunch with L I stopped by the local Castle store to do a little shopping for tonight. I have enjoyed experimenting with L's pain thresh hold, and today's additions were purchased with that in mind. She is also being punished tonight for an infraction yesterday that left me quite upset with her; I did not get to see her last night so I have had to prolong delivery of the punishment, and L has been hoping that perhaps it won't be as strict as it would have been had I delivered it last night.

She is hoping wrong.

Back to the experimentation. For the most part, pain has not worked as a form of punishment, because though I have, at various times, had L sobbing with tears as a result of various inflictions, they have also made her so incredibly wet that she has had to wipe herself out before I fucked her because her pussy would literally be soaking. Soaking.  The two exceptions so far that I know L considers punishments are when I strike my belt buckle across her nipples, and, a more recent discovery, flogging her with her chain leash. I've used the leash on her before in numerous ways, such as running the chain all along her body, striking her with the leather strap, binding the chain around her breasts ... wbo knew a leash had so many purposes? I love the sound of when I attach the leash to her collar and then I have her in my full control; fucking her from behind while I pull back on the leash is something I enjoy very, very much. I'm putting flogging her with the leash into the favorite category as well; when I did it the other night it left some delicious welts on her ass that had her sore the next day.

L has to wait another eight hours before her punishment as well as being introduced to some new sensations. I personally can't wait.

Monday, August 6, 2012

Owned

The day after the golden shower I asked L to write me how it made her feel. This is what she said:

"Let's see.  There was the anticipation of waiting all evening for you to come home....then no mention of it and I thought you had forgotten or were too tired.  I was surprised when at 12:30 you still wanted to.  I felt super submissive while undressing and getting into the bathtub....wanted you to cover me, mark me, own me.  Like I said, it wasn't bad at all and I don't mind......if it was something you chose to do everyday, I would be fine with that.  I guess if I had to give one word to my feelings as it happened it would be....owned."

I have decided that Monday nights will be maintenance night for us. Monday maintenance. Also, we are going to be apart for over a week after tonight. With absence of the heart coming upon us, I think it is important that tonight's maintenance leaves L with a sense of being owned as much as possible.


Golden Shower, Part II

L and I had just finished up with a vigorous sexual romp and were lying in bed together, her head on my chest, my hand stroking her cheek and pulling at her hair. It was late...close to 12:30a.m. We had talked about the golden shower most of the day, sending each other little texts about and emails. My workday is close to 14 hours, so when I got home and didn't say anything to her, she had thought I had forgotten and wasn't going to bring it up. But I hadn't forgotten. Was looking for that right moment, in particular, when the kids were both in bed with the door closed.

12:30a.m.

"We still have something to do tonight," I told her, and she looked at me and nodded her head in agreement. "Go into the bathroom"

She went into the bathroom and a few minutes later I followed, going inside and closing the door and locking it behind me. L was naked and kneeling in the shower and she looked up at me as I joined her.

And then it happened.

Without hesitation, I took my dick in my hands and pointed it towards her chest and the piss came out, hot and fast, and I coated her tits with it and then up to her shoulders. She kneeled there and stared up at me, did not say a word..did not flinch. My ever so obedient pet. The look in her eyes was quite clear. You are my Master. You are my Master. I aimed a little higher and pissed on her cheek then over to her hair, my eyes making contact with her the whole time while I marked my territory and claimed her as my own. It was an amazing sensation..so raw...so crude...so possessive in its nature.

Finishing up, I knelt down with her as she turned on the shower head and I took a bar of soap and cleansed my piss off of my pet. I got out of the shower and let her finish up and went back into the bedroom. Moments later, she joined me, taking the towel wrapped around her body off and crawling under the covers, her nude body next to mine, her head with her hair still damp from the shower and smelling clean, lying on my chest. I kissed her and held her tight. Few words were spoken. They were not needed.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Golden Shower, Part I


I don’t see this subject much in the D/s blogging world. It seems to fall more under the umbrella of “limits” more than anything, at least in the readings and discovery I have done. The one exception we have found…and it was this particular one that piqued the interest of L and I…was from the “Within Reality” website that is one of the better ones out there in terms of essays on the D/s lifestyle:


Prior to entering the D/s relationship with L, it was certainly something I had never considered or sparked much arousal for me. L felt the same way. She was the one who initially discovered the above essay and forwarded it to me, with the note that it changed her perspective on the act.

It changed mine as well, and over the last three months we have talked off and on about it, what the act itself meant, how it would make us feel. How it would make me feel and what it would mean to me as her Master. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that this was something, without doubt, I wanted to do with L. I was attracted to it for numerous reasons. As we continue to explore our D/s side in the bedroom, I have found myself becoming more and more aggressive with L, and our sex (which was always very good) has intensified as things became more and more physical, where slapping and spanking were a given. L has never been wetter than the last couple of weeks, and I have never been harder.

The thought of coating L with my piss seemed like the ultimate in aggression, something so crudely animalistic in nature that sparked my inner beast. But even more than that was what it meant. For both of us, we looked it as being me marking my territory, the ultimate in claiming L as my own. My own.

We have talked about it. And talked about it.

Last night we did it.

Details to follow.