Monday, May 12, 2014

freedom




I think one of the joys of a D/s relationship is the tremendous amount of freedom it allows for.

It would be easy to think/say that the Dom is the only one who gets the freedom. After all, the world is his oyster. He gets to pick and choose what he wants his sub to do, use her in any manner that he sees fit. He is free to do with her as he pleases.

But subs have their freedom as well, and maybe even more so. Yes, being able to do whatever you want has an aspect of freedom to it, but then again, so does having to do whatever you are told to do. Lack of choice…or, rather, not worrying about having to choose can be just as liberating as the one calling the shots. This of course is why balance is such an essential structure of a healthy D/s relationship.

The most significant freedom for a sub, though, is the freedom of absolute and complete sexuality. Here’s what I mean. There are certain things I do with L that she would never ask me to do. Things she would never confess to enjoying. I do things to her, in her words, that ladies are not supposed to want to have done to them or enjoy doing them. By giving me the decision-making when it comes to all sexual matters, I have given her freedom from those concerns. She does not have to worry if what she is doing/craving would be considered “lady like” because she simply has no say in the matter, she does what is my bidding and that is that.

I suppose in some ways it is a double bonus. She gets the knowledge that she is pleasing me, and if what we do makes her drip (as it usually does), then, you know, winning!

I don’t believe I have ever managed to get her to confess to a fantasy of any kind, though I have relayed many of them and a good number of them we have worked on. Others will be worked on when the moment presents itself.  Do these fantasies I have mirror ones that L has? Maybe. She won’t admit though, just bow her head and say “Whatever you want, Sir” while, down below, there is a good likelihood that a wet spot is forming on the front of her panties in anticipation of what I want.

Because maybe, just maybe, Miss Pristine wants it as well.

There are times I want to grab the back of her hair, bring her to her knees, and command her to tell me. To bring out her darkest fantasies. Maybe she is already living then, but maybe there are others.  I want to make her confess to things she wants to do..with me…perhaps with others. I want her to speak of cocks and cunts, of cum and come, of pain and pleasure. Bring it all out of her, let it all roll out her mouth befoe my desire from her words overcomes me, and then no more words come out of her mouth…they won’t be able, because I will be fucking it.

I could do those things, of course. Make her tell me…everything. I have started a new ritual on Thursday called “Tell All Thursday” where she has to answer any question.

I could do all of those things.

But then again, why take her freedom away from her?





9 comments:

  1. Being a "lady " is over rated :) . I like your Thursday idea ! ~ s

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  2. Lovely idea, Tell All Thursday! One thing you could do, is play with her and get her worked up, then refuse to let her come until she describes in detail how she wants you to do it. Personally, I agree with lils, lady-like has no place in the bedroom. I am a lady in public, but at home I am proud to be a cock worshipping slut for my Sir. It is wonderful that you recognize the freedom that you give L by dominating her :-)

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    1. Thank you for the comment. Let me clarify that L is also a wonderful cock worshipping slut in the bedroom. Nothing pristine or puritan about the acts she performs on me, day in and day out.....

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    2. As a reader of your blog I have no doubts that you and L are naughty in the bedroom :-) I guess what I meant to convey is that I hope L doesn't feel negatively about herself for enjoying being "unladylike" with you. I used to feel that way, until my Sir taught me differently. Apologize if I gave the impression that I thought L was a "prude" :-)

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  3. Maybe its because i have children?? I dont know, i am the one who still says hooha remember? And to be honest, i think S prefers me this way. L

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  4. Get a room already ! ❤️ lol ~ s

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  5. Your take on a sub's freedom is quite interesting. I find it to be true for me. However I've recently stumbled upon another freedom of sorts. I am the one who brought the D/s idea to my husband. The trouble is my "idea" of the perfect D/s relationship was forming in me years before I brought the idea up. So by the time we had established a real D/s relationship, (we've had several bouts of on for a while then off over the years) I was miles ahead of Him. I was quite critical at first and prone to pout when He didn't punish me like I thought he ought. Now, things are different. He has initiated some nightly rituals that help solidify in my mind how serious he is about our D/s dynamic. He tells me often He doesn't want to live any other way. There are no more doubts in my mind as to who is in charge. He loves me, protects me, provides for me, and gives me what I need. I in turn trust him with us....completely. Last night I broke a rule. I had the freedom to not worry about what was going to happen to me. I knew whatever happened, or didn't happen, would be what He thought best. What did happen involved a corner, a near naked sub, an oscillating fan in the stationary position, and a bath brush. Oh my....

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  7. The freedom to enjoy my sexuality, to make no apologies for it has been liberating. I love knowing that, while I am not a slut, I get to be Sir's slut and that he loves me for it.

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