Monday, July 8, 2013

Questions/Answers

L and I were lying in bed last night watching TV after wrapping up a long and productive weekend that had a nice blend of domesticity (family camping trip, projects in the yard) along with TTWD thrown in when we could.

Never enough TTWD it seems. Hard sometimes finding that quiet time together to get our kink on to the full extent that we want to, but the good part is that SOMETHING manages to happen everyday. It is a rare day where the cane does not make its way out of the closet and in to my hands and subsequently, across L's ass. It is a rare day...an exceptionally rare day...where we don't have sex. And to that extent, I know we are fortunate to have what we do have. That at least once a day, no matter how busy things are, we find a way to connect in that special way. Very fortunate.

So last night....we were watching TV, and it was still relatively early. I had gotten off work earlier than planned so we had some extra down time together. We had already managed to get in a small session hours before that, right before I went to work. (there is something completely, well, delicious, about fucking right before work. Does wonders for my attitude, and "freshly fucked" is a damn good sensation...) and undoubtedly, another one was going to take place before we turned off the lights for the night.

Commercial break from our TV show.

Me: "Ask me a question. Any question."
L: "Am I going to get spanked tonight?"
Me: "Yes, you are."

Back to the TV show. Another commercial break.

Me: "Ask me another question."
L: "Am I going to get spanked hard?"
Me: (looking at her in the eyes intently) "Perhaps."
(this led to a conversation of what exactly we meant by "hard" as what is hard for L one night might not be hard the next, what she can take and how hard she can take it sometimes changes from one night to the next....)

The tv show ended, and out came the cane. L obediently assumed the position, her ass slightly raised in the air. A canvas ready to be marked.

And so it began.

Looking back at it now, I suppose I did spank her a little hard....

Perhaps.


4 comments:

  1. The connection time is important. Too many couples don't consider it priority enough to make sure to schedule that time together into each day, or just about each day. It's great that you and L realize it and have set each other priority. Your relationship is strong and will only grow stronger.

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  2. I had one very brief D/s experience and it left a bad impression upon me. It felt very abusive. I read some of your blogs and I do find a sense of beauty, love, acceptance and a deep connection but how do you manage that without it ever feeling or coming across as too much I guess "Dominance"?

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    Replies
    1. There's a huge difference between what occurs in an abusive relationship and what occurs in a D/s relationship, main one being that in D/s, what takes place is a consensual act between two people. And as in any relationship, its success is contingent upon the relationship between the two involved. With L and I, we had the foundation of a (vanilla) relationship in place before we started exploring D/s, so elements such as trust and love were already there. Trust is huge. Communication is huge. Moreso with D/s than vanilla.

      So to answer your question...how do I do what I do to L without feeling too dominant or abusive? Part of it is knowing her limits. A big part is being observant to how she reacts to a flogging or spanking. And of course a huge part is knowing that I am doing something to her that she likes. What turns her on. I will generally stop every now and then during a spanking session and reach underneath her to stroke her pussy. 10 times out of 10 I will find absolute wetness. 10 times out of 10, with the physical evidence of her arousal in place, I will resume the spanking.

      Hope this helps.

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  3. Hi, I am new to reading your blog - just wanted to say I have enjoyed what I have read so far.
    The relationship between you and L is very sweet to read about, you both have something my Husband and I are trying hard to obtain also in regards to this lifestyle!

    I loved the whole commercial break question/answer time that led to spanking, what a wonderful way to enjoy an evening!

    butterfly :)

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