Friday, March 1, 2013

"Cum explosion"

Here is L's perspective on what happened last night...

My perspective on last night:  Ugh....I tried....I really did.  If the dynamics of our relationship were different, I wouldn't have done it.  I would have been like, fuck no man.  But they aren't so I had no choice (which makes it ten times easier actually).  I was dead tired, normally am around Thursday or Friday after a week of only sleeping 5 to 6 hours a night.  Had cooked dinner, made dessert, mopped the floor and gave a child a bath.  Gave a half ass effort to talk Sir out of it but knew it was useless....did as I was told and instructed.  I wish I could be one of those people who gulp it down and then stare up at their Master with doe eyes.  Nope, not even close.  It was forceful and very plentiful.  It went all over like a cum explosion (I always tease S that he should be a porn star as he has the money shot for sure....oh, and I have called him "Buckets" from day one as in...he could fill one).  I gagged a couple of times and immediately felt awful how I handled things.  I could tell S was not happy as I cleaned it up and promised to do better next time....all the while thinking that there is no way.  I have done it quite nicely a few times before but had help from my dear friend vodka or another such acquaintance.  I think a lot has to do with mindset and my mindset wasn't quite there last night to be honest.  It may help to move the spanking time to before instead of after (who knows?) so I am in the right mindset.  I am also afraid of it shooting out my nose....before you shake your head, it is a legitimate concern I promise.  So I definitely need to work on this and just get over my hang ups, get onto my knees and worship what I am damn lucky to have. 


  1. Lovely thoughts! I have the same problem as L. I have never let anyone come in my mouth. Now that I realize I'm submissive, I'll have to do it eventually! So it's nice to see someone else go through the same thing. Thanks for the perspective!

    1. Thank you! This seems to something I am really struggling with. L

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  4. L,

    This is one activity that I, too had difficulty with. The mind set is critical for me. You see, I used to be told I was worthless etc. So I protected myself by completely taking this off the game board. None of it. But my husband, slowly and gently showed me how much he valued me and loved me. No, I didn't need to do that. He was fine without that activity. That's what he used to say ( and truly meant it); and to be honest, as I grew more confident with myself, I learned that I wanted to. Mindset. Something I knew would give him great pleasure. Something I knew would show him my love. Something he had never asked me to do - I was able to give to him.

    I am blessed in this way - while our marriage is completely old school - he places my pleasure, my comfort and peace above all. We are trying new activities - ones where I have a safe word and he takes all control. I am learning to let go. Got to say, it is amazingly exciting. And I love when he takes what he wants. Only once did I start to safe word, and then I stopped myself. I was just scared. He wasn't hurting me at all. So L, I'm sorry this ended up being so long - but you are so so right - mindset!

    Love, Isabella

  5. I was once married to a woman who was reluctant to suck my cock, and who hated to swallow. I remember once she gagged on a big load and spit it out all over me. Her blowjobs were unimaginative and perfunctory, and she finally said she didn't like having a cock in her mouth and wouldn't do it anymore.

    Now I'm married to a woman who gives fabulous blowjobs. She sucks my cock on demand, any time of day or night, and surprises me with blowjobs on her own initiative. She once blew me almost 600 days in a row and she loved every one! Her blowjobs are imaginative and expertly delivered; she relishes worshipping my cock to the point she has made herself orgasm while doing it. She swallows completely and without complaint every time.

    Both women are in fact the same person. These things take time, so be patient and keep tryng!